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"To the world you may be one person...but to one person you may be the world..."

About Me

Melissa
I grew up in a village of 500 people and now live in a beach town of 10 000. Wife to Jeff, Mama to Makenna and Jack. This is my place to share what's up with us, and the place where I sometimes need to pour my heart out about the not so sunshiney moments. This is my happy place. Thanks for stopping by :) Copyright 2012 by Melissa Wormington, that no part of this blog may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, without permission from the publisher.
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The Wormingtons

The Wormingtons
Jeff, Makenna, Jack and Melissa. Spring 2012. Photo credit: Tricia Denomme/Hope Photography

Monday, June 25, 2012

shhh...do you hear that?

Do you hear that? 

tick...tick...tick...

I do.

tick...tick...tick...

Seems it's all I hear lately.

tick, tick, tock....tick, tick, tock.

I blame my brother. 

tick, tick, tock

I'm trying to ignore it. 
My head is ignoring it. 

But my heart...my heart hears it.

tick, tick, tock. 

My baby is starting school in September. His orientation is tomorrow.  He is more than ready.  Academically he has been ready for a long time, and now he's emotionally ready too.  Which is a big deal.  I am thrilled for him. His time has come and he is ready.  He is going to thrive.  flourish.  grow.  shine. 

And for me...finally...freedom.  6 hours every Friday to myself, guilt free.  No more scheduling around the sacred nap time hours.  More playdates.  birthday parties.  Big kid fun.  Before and after school care  instead of full day daycare. 

And yet, I still hear it...

tick, tick, tock.  tick, tick, tock

My heart is convincing:  "Cassie".  "Brodie".  "Taylor"  "Thomas".   Those first fluttery kicks.  Breastfeeding.  Rocking.  Sleeping baby on my chest.   Belly laughs.  Makenna as a real help.  Jack as a big brother. Bigger family. 

My head scoffs:  Nausea. Labour.  Sleep Deprivation.  No room.  Cost of daycare. Starting over.  Going backwards.  Too much space between them.  Jack as a middle child.  The cost of extracurriculars and post secondary education.

The reality is I cannot accomplish such a feat alone.  And that's a good thing.  Because the other half of this equation isn't hearing any such ticking or tocking. And if he did, I think he would throw the whole clock into the lake. That's okay.  My head knows this.  It means this is a done deal.  There won't be any more and that's okay.  My baby is starting school, we are leaving the early years behind and are moving on to the Big Kid Years. 

We are blessed, so very blessed with the two healthy, happy, well adjusted children we have. We can now go on family vacations without worrying about diapers, bottles, playpens, strollers, naptimes, big carseats and who stays behind with the baby while the other goes on the ride with the "Big Kid".   We have traded those days for days filled with bicycles, baseball bats and soccer balls.  Construction paper, gluesticks and board games.  Out with the Little Swimmers, in with the lifejackets.  Out with the sippy cups, in with the juice boxes.  Mum Mums to Mike and Ikes. 
But there will always be "You are my Sunshine"

We are equal in ratio; 2 adults:2 kids. 

Once my brother and his wife have their baby in November (ish),  I will have all the snuggles and overnights I need while still maintaining a well rested and stroller free lifestyle. 

And maybe then it will stop?

tick, tick, tock.  tick, tick, tock.

Perhaps I should get a dog.

2 comments:

crazyfoodlady said...

You know, I had a moment not too long ago when I was babysitting my nephew Jack. He was about 6 months old, laughing & smiling, and I thought "I could do this again. He is so much fun. We should try for a girl." He looked at me with his big blue eyes opened his mouth and ... puked down the front of my shirt. Yep, thats why I only have two.

Courtney said...

"Baby Brown" will come visit anytime you need a fix! :)